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Forex Jokes
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Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) Mar 15 2012 at 23:26
The market may be bad, but I slept like a baby last night. I woke up every hour and cried.
The market is weird. Every time one guy sells, another one buys, and they both think they're smart.
The real measure of your wealth is how much you'd be worth if you lost all your money.
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster. (c) Clint Eastwood
What's considered enough money? Just a little bit more. (c) Will Rogers
If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars. (c) J. Paul Getty

This was funny as well,



Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) Mar 22 2012 at 00:25 (edited Mar 22 2012 at 00:27 )
crap. I dont know how to post pictures...


Member Since Sep 02, 2010  1 posts AlHati (AlHati) Mar 22 2012 at 16:10


Member Since Jul 23, 2010  70 posts Del (horse1bun) Mar 22 2012 at 19:52 (edited Mar 22 2012 at 19:54 )
hahaha I tried to buy silver from kitco once... My bank refused the transaction, they claim they tried to call me, yea right...

go with the flow; just be on the right end of the wave

Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) Mar 23 2012 at 16:13


Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) Mar 29 2012 at 22:36


Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) May 03 2012 at 20:02
You have 2 cows. You go on strike, organize a riot and block the roads because you want 3 cows.

You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are 1/10 the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called ‘Cowkimon’ and market it worldwide.

You have 2 cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

You have 2 cows, but you don’t know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

You have 2 cows. You count them and learn that you have 5 cows. You count again and learn you have 42 cows. You count again and learn you have 2 cows. You open another bottle of vodka.

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reports otherwise.

You have 2 cows. You worship them.

You have 2 cows. Both are mad.

Everyone thinks you have many cows. You tell them you have none but they don’t believe you and bomb the @#$%&! out of your country. You still have no cows but at least you are part of a democracy.

NewZealand Capitalism
You have 2 cows. The one on the left is looking pretty sexy..

You have 2 cows. Business seems good. You close the office and go for a few celebratory beers.

You have 2 cows. The Republicans say they are adequate but how can we make them more productive without incurring additional expense. The Democrats say the cows are tainted and we need more regulation, no profit incentive and another whole herd to give milk to the underprivileged and the swarms of illegals crossing our borders. Government statistics say we have 5 cows but a revision is forthcoming.


Member Since Nov 19, 2011  40 posts Frank (Clash) May 03 2012 at 20:07
You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away

You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.

EnronVenture Capitalism
You have 2 cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.

AndersenModel Capitalism
You have 2 cows. You shred them


Member Since Feb 24, 2012  77 posts TradeCopier2012 May 04 2012 at 03:19
ROFL - best forex jokes I ever read, thanks man


Member Since Jun 19, 2011  7 posts Maciek (AS23) May 04 2012 at 07:36
love it LOL

what one man can do another can do
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